all hallows eve

hello.

happy halloween.

a short and sweet (and not so spooky) love note to all hallows eve.

before i get into it, i’ve been mulling over the boo basket discourse all over the internet and i can’t help but feel like it’s directed towards the mommy bloggers, and excessive consumerism and exclusivity that “celebrating holidays and traditions” has presented on social media, especially over the past several years. as someone who loves seasons and celebrating each and every holiday, reading this made me feel… gross. i can’t help but cringe at the pressure and influence (and guilt) i felt as a young mom to buy buy buy holiday goodies to surprise my daughter with during each holiday. fortunately for me as a broke college student, i had to find ways to repurpose gifts and diy my way into making our traditions and holidays feel special. it wasn’t “instagrammable”, but it was ours and it meant something to us. whether it was decor i had as a young girl, or creating homemade gifts for family, it always came from the heart. that being said, before i became a broke college student again during the years i was fortunate enough to work a high paying job that gave me the capacity to spend on excess things we didn’t need, i always felt ick afterwards- disingenuous and fake. why was i buying all of this shit we didn’t need? i can tell you honestly that 99% of the time i was either influenced or i “did it for the gram”. yuck.

so this is my way of reminding myself and anyone reading this to never ever feel pressured into buy into the consumerisms of the holidays. i’m still guilty of overspending when i get a little too excited. there’s nuance to all of this!!!!! there’s a time and a place to spend (just keep your intentions in mind). and in regards to the boo baskets… are people really spending hundreds of dollars to make an aesthetically pleasing halloween basket for their 3 year old, or is it for their instagram followers? who knows…

speaking of halloween- in the spirit of the holiday, can i tell you about my traditions?

when i was a young girl, i looked forward to trick or treating with my little brother every year. my mom always had a way of making the holidays feel special and intentionally did things like decorate our lunch bags with halloween stickers and pack spooky snacks in our lunch bags (enough to share with friends). she would help us hand make our costumes and we would decorate the entire house to feel autumnal and (a little spooky) as we inched closer to halloween night. we baked ginger molasses cookies and decorated them with orange frosting, candy corn and peanut m&m’s. truthfully, my favorite part of the day was coming home from a long trick or treating adventure and eating homemade chili and cornbread on the couch watching halloween movies and passing out candy to other kids in the neighborhood. my brother and i would sort out our candy and trade for our favorites. thankfully the candy i hated was the candy he loved most (and vice versus). a win win if you ask me.

i carried these traditions with me into adulthood and added a few of my own. on halloween morning, i make pumpkin waffles and put on a jazzy halloween playlist. i get all of my candy and snacks prepped for trick or treaters, and yes, i wear a festive shirt or headband or something spooky all day because why not. besides trick or treating, there will always be homemade chili and cornbread and it’s the great pumpkin, charlie brown playing on a loop throughout the day and into the evening for comfort. i bake one last batch of pillsbury pumpkin cookies and do some version of a halloween themed craft. today i’ll be painting pumpkins and roasting pumpkin seeds.

when i was a teen, i’d spend most of the evening watching horror films but now that i’m older, my anxiety decides what i’m going to watch. it’s usually a mix of the nightmare before christmas, coraline, vintage disney halloween shorts, and more.

i’ll safely assume that the for most people who enjoy halloween and other holidays, there’s a sense of nostalgia and parts of our childhood that we’re clinging to (inner child healing). it took quite some time to realize that while it’s okay to reminisce on the memories and traditions that ground us and serve as an anchor during difficult moments, but it’s equally important to stay present and create new traditions and moments that make you forget about feeling pressured to document it.

sometimes i think to myself, it’s really not that deep.

do what makes you feel happy and comforted and do it for you and your loved ones (not strangers on the internet).

halloween master list for further reading and inspiration for books, films, music, and everything in between.

okay that’s all for today.

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i love you.

bye.

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